so SISPEC it is.

Ever wondered why God do not punish pastors with seemingly warped doctrine? Punish them by like, destroying their fellowship, making their roof fall down on their head, or even making them vomit and shit at the same time. Sometimes, i hear people discussing about certain churches regarding their, somewhat, bad practices and their incorrect interpretation of the bible. Overtime, discussions leads to impressions, and ultimately, seperation. Personally, i was swayed by their opinions once. That was when i was still very very enthusiastic for God and felt what i thought was a 'Holy Anger' from God.

Now, my spirit is very weak and my life is very bad, but one thing's for sure; sometimes, things are more interesting and meaningful when viewed for another angle - when u are down in the slumps. Yes, doctrines can be faulted and new theories can be formed everyday, but does God cares as much about all these as much as He cares for pre-believers to hear the good news of Christ? As much as i enjoy listening to theological debates, i am sure that preaching the Word and love of Christ is much more meaningful than having grown up men and women quarrelling over bible tenses and understandings.

Maybe, when i am dry and feel hopeless, when i start not to envy the brains of the theologians but to envy the passion and love for Christ which propells any individual to accomplish exploits for God. And that, left me humbled when i look at how the past 10 weeks of life had been. Where is thy passion, caleb?

Learn, to forgive yourself. If not, no matter how many times Jesus forgive u, u'll still be in bondage.

At last, i am a private in that organisation.

oh well. Kinda miss talking to joelong the moment we hung up. And tim1 msged the next day cos of *erhem*, sth interesting, lol, secret. And the kestrel man before me, and of course handsome chaos. ok now up to this point of typing, i am starting to miss them even more. There's sth special abt guys' fellowship i guess. Maybe because we talk abt army stuff together, share our ups and downs, encourage each other, or maybe the knowledge that some1 had had it much worse than me. Heck lah, at least, this kinda bond is edifying. Now, one is a armour tankee trainee, the other, an officer cadet, and the kestrel man- a medic. 2 lost souls left to face their posting results.

Thank God for Block leave. One more week of freedom left before heading back to the greens.

So there i was, knocking desperately on one side of the pale green door, so anxious to get to the other side... and it was 1.00 am in the morning. The dreaded thought of spending one bookout night sleeping outside my door, it jsut filled my mind. Suddenly, a thought came into my mind, " If u had already tahan the field camp, what is sleeping on nice hard tiled floor?".

OK, firstly, its my bookout night. Secondly, a night in bunk at Kestrel Section 4 is much more comfortable than a tiled floor.

Never mind, i was already resigned to my destiny. Dad should be already asleep, brother too cos of the children's creative arts camp organising, and my mom, if i wake her up, she cannot fall asleep for the next few hours. So, the only choice was to sleep outside.

Positioned my bag, and laid down on the small sofa meant for shoe-wearers, and was about to fall asleep, when i recieved one sms, from a person i never thought will be still awake - my mom. Understand that, normally my mom calls or sms, a nagging session will follow, but heck it, i will rather get a nagging session than to constrain myself to a 1 metre long sofa without the luxury of the toilet.

"where are u now?"

"almost falling asleep outside the door. knocked and called but no one answerd :("

3 mites later, i was back into my 5 room flat in Kembangan.

Thank God for a caring mother.

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so today, went out with section mates for katong laksa, fei fei wanton mee, kim's hokkien mee, pool game. rocks man. lol. my stomache is kinda like made of rubber. can expand like crazy.

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Hai, Why must "Fuck" be a vulgarity? For one, it sounds so cool, like a slang, just that maybe, abit more funky. Secondly, this one word can be used in so many ways - noun, verb, adjective, pronoun and even punctuation! It is also a word used to describe a process whereby without this process, there will not be a next generation. Another interesting thing to note about this word is, this word can be used to describe any feeling, from sadness to anger, to happiness and joy. Even excitement, or fear. Its idiot-prove, its convenient, and needless to say that, if it were not for the vulgar reputation which people use it for, u can be sure i will be using this word like free.

Hai, u can just trust Human Beings to corrupt the meaning of just anything, even a beautiful word such as that.

Long weekend, this totally rocks.
SmileS. :D
Now, the burning question is, WHITE OR GREY?
i love white, but white will turn to grey soon, so i might as well buy it grey right? grrr. sialah.

Its realli nice meetin up with the sfc people yesterday eating a very expensive lunch, namely, tim pris vonn chaos joel jem jayce jan daniel nic. Very gossippy for once. Nevermind, cos i kinda felt better after sharing, though i dint realli wanted to. haha.

ps: thanks pest, for helping me find that button to retrieve password.

If not, i would have been university-less. Phew!~
So its comfirmed, NTU material engineering. One of the professor being the scientist i most admire in Singapore, Deacon Professor Freddy Boey. God, You are super great!